Ok ... so ... that's me. Yeah ... ~coughs~ tonight ... at 1:02am. Sometimes there just aren't any words are there? I can only imagine your retinas burning on Thursday when you tune in for my lastest bizarro post and find this! ~laughing~My hair is fast going ... on Monday ... it all goes. Until then ... it's a mostly pink mohawk that has succeded in making me look even more nutty than I even imagined. ~smiles~
Why the hair cut? No, no, no ... I'm not headed to rehab like Brittany or anything ... and no I wasn't cutting out my spectacular hair extensions. I shaved my head in support of one of the ladies that we work with here. She has breast cancer and is losing her hair this week. I have been wrestling with this for a while. I knew that I felt like I was supposed to cut it ... but I wasn't sure that I could really make myself do it. You guys might remember when my Mom had cancer ... I told her then ... that when the time came, that I'd shave my head with her so that she wouldn't have to go through being bald alone.
She never ended up losing all of her hair because her chemo was cut short.For a woman I can think of no more difficult thing than losing one's hair. You know ... a woman's hair is her glory and all that stuff ... and Lord knows that men love a woman's hair. So in addition to the fight for your life, when you have breast cancer especially ... including all of the trauma of losing your breast ... you lose the beauty of your hair. No changing your mind ... no turning back ... nothing. If you go with modern treatment ... the hair goes.
When I told our co-worker, Marisa that I was going to shave my head to support her ... that it would be a reminder every day to pray for her and to remember just a tiny piece of what she is going through ... I think she was really shocked ... but touched. Hopefully it will offer her some measure of comfort or ease that we will be bald together and we can share fashion head ware! ~smiles~ I am not stupid enough to think that cutting one's hair means that one understands what it's like to have cancer ... the fears or the struggles ... I know it doesn't mean that I understand anything but one single vanity. But I do know what it's like to be told that you have cancer ... in my case, I was blessed that it was a misdiagnosis. I know what it's like to have someone you love struggle with cancer, and people you love die from cancer. It's a horrible disease. No doubt. But ... I can make a gesture of support ... so ... I can't take it back now ... . 
We aren't allowed to have radical color in our hair for work or anything like that ... so I colored it pink - for breast cancer awareness ... it was my way of trying to have some fun and work my way up to the big loss. Tonight I took the second step and had the sides and back completely shaved to a mohawk. Dan and RJ both shaved their hair into mohawks also in support. It was pretty funny actually. This weekend we are all going up to the mountain house for a get away weekend (with 4 couples from work) and then ... on Monday before we return to work, I'll have to shave this off and pretty much keep it covered until it grows out a bit.
And update on -Konnichiwa- : Shane had to cancel our appointment last week to finish her. He was sick, but we are supposed to finish up on Friday before we head up to the mountain house. He did tell me on the phone last week that he has started going to church! I was so excited about that ... I went and got him a new bible from RJ and I ... hopefully it will be used! He was very excited and we talked a while about all that has been going on with him. He is really happy with the church he is going to ... it's a non-denominational church in Greensboro and he feels VERY accepted there.
I'll try to write more tommorrow and bring everyone up to date on the rest of everything that's been going on. I've been off my blogging lately ... hopefully I'll get my groove back!
7 comments:
Wow!!! Great story C! When you finally cut it all off you will have to make RJ rub your head. Trust me it will put you to sleep.
Musa Out!
At first my eyes of course caught the picture. I smiled...then I read the story. Great one. My brother grew his hair out to donate in honor of my mother. Did I tell everyone that my mom recently survived her 3rd occurance of cancer? Thanks for your sacrifice, love the cut, gonna love the bald head.
I think you look GREAT! I love the pink, though. Great support idea, and I hope your friend wins the battle. My mom-in-law also recently survived breast cancer and is now cancer-free, so we have been deeply affected by this horrible disease.
I so admire you. Wow, what courage! You looked too cool. Keep us posted. I don't think I'd have enough nerve to do it - but you Rock!
Caroline...I read this blog every day and am amazed at the woman you've become...I agree with my dearest - I love the pink.
May I just say that the song "Rescue" by Newsong as ministered to me today. I had to download it from Itunes this morning and put it on my Ipod before I went to work. It is shining a light on my heart about how desperate I still need the Lord. He is the only one who can rescue us from the situations that we find ourselves in.
Musa Out!
I think you are wrong about the cancer that you had. I believe that you did have it. We were not nearly as close to you and Rich as we are now at that point in our relationship, but when you told us you had cancer we prayed for you incessantly. I told my grandparents and others to include you on their prayer chains. I know that you had a miraculous healing, and I believe that you should tell other people that that is what it was. You have a very powerful part of your personal testimony that you may not even realize you have.
Dan
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